how to write: in 23 easy steps By Ashley Zbylot

Feeling inspired? Want to write? Today is the day! First, pour yourself a nice, warm cup of coffee, nothing gets creative juices flowing like the nectar of the gods, besides, you can’t write a short story without a good, old cup of Joe. Sit in your desk chair, this simple step often gets ignored. Next, stare at the blankness of your laptop screen, lean in if you have to, feel the crushing pressure of the abyss of white, an untapped ocean of possibility, just waiting to be explored, and realize that you have no clue what to write. Squirm in the desk chair a little – that’s a crucial step - why are desk chairs always so uncomfortable? Type “once,” no, backspace, “There was,” no, backspace again. This desk chair is obviously bad luck, move to the couch! Look out the nearest window for at least thirty seconds…. Ponder, writers are supposed to ponder things, really lean into it, make a face if you have to! Sip your coffee…. The coffee’s gotten cold. Clearly, nothing’s getting done today and you can’t write with a cold cup of coffee! Go to the kitchen, microwave the coffee, rummage for snacks, snacks are crucial, they fuel greatness, especially your roommate’s pita chips, they’ll never know. Return, sit, and stare at the screen again. You are getting sleepy… very sleepy… give in to your heavy eye-lids, clearly, the coffee didn’t work. Why are couches so comfortable. Doze off, it’s ok! You can always try again tomorrow.